I've writan a buke.
I've written a book. It's finished and I've sent it to some wonderful people who do publishing and I hope someone decides to publish it, and soon. In the meantime, if you think you'd like to publish it, let me know...
It's a very silly book. There are lots of jokes (I mean it, there are LOTS. A thousand, maybe? I can't count that high because I fall asleep somewhere in the 60s), stories, poems, instructions, pictures and cartoons, all by me.
You will like it very much, because you're the best. If you like laughing, oh boy, just watch out, because we're literally talking hilarious here.
To be more specific, if you enjoy the writings of Jack Handey and/or Demetri Martin, this will be right up your nozzle. And even if you don't, you'll 100% guaranteed love it to pieces.
If you join the mailing list, you'll find out about the book if and when it gets published (and I really hope it does, because literally everyone who has ever been on television or eaten food now has a publishing deal and I know for a fact that none of those people has ever managed to write a decent joke that contains the words oesophagus and shoelace).
If you're a publisher, please get in touch!
It's a very silly book. There are lots of jokes (I mean it, there are LOTS. A thousand, maybe? I can't count that high because I fall asleep somewhere in the 60s), stories, poems, instructions, pictures and cartoons, all by me.
You will like it very much, because you're the best. If you like laughing, oh boy, just watch out, because we're literally talking hilarious here.
To be more specific, if you enjoy the writings of Jack Handey and/or Demetri Martin, this will be right up your nozzle. And even if you don't, you'll 100% guaranteed love it to pieces.
If you join the mailing list, you'll find out about the book if and when it gets published (and I really hope it does, because literally everyone who has ever been on television or eaten food now has a publishing deal and I know for a fact that none of those people has ever managed to write a decent joke that contains the words oesophagus and shoelace).
If you're a publisher, please get in touch!
I also happen to be looking for an illustrator on a children's book that I've written. Well, I say "working on" - I wrote the text ten years ago and only realised recently that a picture book was the appropriate format for it. I'm very excited about it.
